Alphabet Soup
by Ig0r
Summary: Twenty-six events in the lives of Shawn and Juliet. Because you just can't get enough. Shameless Shules. Oneshot.


**A** **B** **C** **D** **E** **F** **G** **H** **I** **J** **K** **L** **M** **N** **O** **P** **Q** **R** **S T** **U** **V** **W** **X** **Y** **Z**

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**A: Abstract **

When Juliet came through their front door with that painting Shawn immediately grabbed it and started walking in the opposite direction. It took a small argument and some serious make-up sex on Juliet's part to get it on the wall, but in the end the living room became the most beautiful space in the house.

To this day Shawn still claims the painting was his idea.

* * *

**B: Brighter**

Her happiness was so contagious it was like every time she walked into a room the lights became brighter. She was life and fun and love – and now she's gone.

* * *

**C: Conch**

When they were first married Shawn had given her a conch. It was big and spiky with pretty yellow-and-pink designs on the shell. She had just smiled, flattered but confused. He had grinned back. Putting the conch up to her ear he said: "Whenever I'm not with you, just listen – I'm here."

She had kissed him in the midst of their piles of expensive wedding presents. It was the only gift that made its way out of the box.

* * *

**D: Duh**

They had been dating for a year and a half when Juliet had an epiphany: she was in love with Shawn Spencer. Of course this came with quite a bit of anxiety about whether or not Shawn loved her back.

So she asked him: "Shawn, do you love me?"

And he had responded not with a sighing "Yes", not with a dramatic "With all of my heart", but with a simple heart-felt "_Duh!"_

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* * *

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**E: Elephant**

Even decades later Shawn could still remember the day he told his dad he was getting married. He had gone over to his house and danced around the topic all night until Henry had told him to "_spit it out!"_

Shawn couldn't recall a time when the elephant in the room had been bigger than what it was when he told his father. It was silent for several moments. Then Henry gave him his blessing, gripped his shoulder, and walked out to the back porch.

As he left Shawn could hear him crying.

* * *

**F: Fear**

For the longest time Shawn practically lived at the station, hovering over Juliet's desk, following her around the building and into crime scenes, and keeping a sharp eye out for guns. She tried to stop him. It was only after _he_ got shot that he realized that his fear was mutual – she made him walk around with a bulletproof vest on for the rest of the month.

* * *

**G: Gun**

After years of nagging and arguments, Shawn had relented. It took some preparation – chiefly, getting Juliet out of the house – and a serious father-son _talk_ – something Shawn hated doing. Then, after making Jack swear he wouldn't do anything stupid, he handed his ten-year-old son his first gun: a water pistol.

Shawn smiled as he thought back to that moment and the expression on Jack's face. It was identical to the one on his own almost thirty years before.

* * *

**H: Home**

If Shawn was known for anything, it was his flightiness. Of course everyone only saw the surface: him running away. For Shawn it was searching – a giant treasure hunt with no 'X' in sight.

It came as a surprise when Shawn stayed in Santa Barbra. Six years and counting – it was his standing record. If anything, Shawn expected it. He had found what he was looking for.

Home is where the heart is.

* * *

**I: Iguana**

Shawn had always dreamed of owning an exotic pet. He had worked at a pet store in Sacramento that had a talking parrots but it wasn't for sale (even if it was he would have never been able to afford it). So when he spotted an iguana at the local pet shop, he knew he had to get it. But Juliet, obstinate in her role of the maturity figure, said no.

Despite his best efforts, the iguana stayed exactly where it was.

* * *

**J: Joke**

"Jules, I'm gay."

-smack-

* * *

**K: Kite**

He's happy, she reflects, and carefree, like a kite in the breeze. Sometimes she can see him cut his strings and fly away into a whole new world made just for him. Sometimes she wishes she'll take her with him.

Sometimes she wonders why he comes back.

* * *

**L:** **Lie**

Lies depend on people in order to survive. People depend on lies in order to make life bearable. Shawn lies so he can keep his job. Juliet lies so that people won't worry about her. Gus lies so that Shawn won't snoop into his problems. Lassiter lies so that he seems strong. Vick lies because she has to. Abigail lies because the truth hurts. Henry lies because he loves his son too much.

_They all lie_.

And they hate it.

* * *

**M: Mondays**

People always complain about waking up on Mondays. It's almost like a tradition to come into work and moan and groan about their morning and how tired they are and how terrible the day is going to be.

Shawn can't wait to wake up – the eight hours he spends sleeping is that much time he isn't spending with Juliet.

* * *

**N: No**

It's his least favorite word but he's learned to like it.

Like when she's ready for work but he needs help setting up the Xbox; or when he's covered in mud from head to toe but still asks for a hug; or when she's in the middle of a phone call and he needs help finding the TV remote. She says no but she does it anyway.

Shawn knows why. She makes sure of it.

* * *

**O: Obvious**

Of all the men in Santa Barbara, she had to fall in love with the man who couldn't love her back.

It was evident even to the officers at the station. The way she would joke with him – the all-out-head-thrown-back-gosh-I-wish-this-would-never-end laugh. The way she would look at him – the knees-weak-fingers-clenched-lips-tight longing. The way she would wait for him – the head-turning-nail-biting-anxiety that he wouldn't walk through those doors that day. And then the million-watt smile when he did.

And yet every time they were 'just friends'. Because though he saw the obscure, he would never understand the obvious.

* * *

**P: Pink**

Despite all of Shawn's unrelenting contradictions, Juliet knew the baby was a girl. Therefore, the nursery was painted pink. They had bet 100 dollars on it. Shawn was so adamant with his prediction he went as far as to advertize to the entire police department that if he was wrong he would treat every single one of them to a dinner on him.

Six months later Shawn was cradling his first daughter, flat broke and trying not to admit that a girl was what he wanted all along.

* * *

**Q: Question **

The day Shawn asked for her hand was the day Lassiter finally cracked.

It had been a quiet morning at the station. Shawn had decided to make it a little more interesting. So, pulling out the ring he had been carrying around for months, he dropped to one knee and proposed.

Oh, of course Juliet said yes. There was a shocked silence, then lots of laughter and tears and congratulations. Then Carlton Lasstier, head detective of the SBPD, walked up to his worst enemy and proclaimed his happiness for the two lovebirds.

It was the crowning moment in the two mens' relationship. They've been friends ever since.

* * *

**R: Regret**

She was funny but not annoying; she was fearful but not cowardly; she was smart but not a snob; she was caring but not hovering; she was stubborn but not ignorant; she was brave but not stupid.

She _is_ his only regret.

* * *

**S: Secret**

She tried to keep it a secret – she threw out the test, left the house early, hid from him all through the work day – and still, he found out. Jules had just stood there and watched as a smile stretched over his face. Then he whipped out his phone, took a picture of her abdomen, and texted everyone in his contacts (and some that definitely weren't), proclaiming, "GUESS WHO'S GOING TO BE A FATHER?"

The next day the entire station complained about phone bills.

* * *

**T: Tell**

He had thought about telling her so many times – in the shower, on the bed, during breakfast, in the middle of a case, standing in the station, at the diner they went to every Friday night – but he had never gotten up the courage to say it outright. Maybe she already knows, he thought, maybe she's waiting for the right moment too.

And so, in the name of uncertainty, he kept silent and hoped and prayed and waited.

* * *

**U: Unknown**

For the first time in his life he wishes he were actually psychic. Maybe he could have seen this coming – despite his father's warnings it had seemed exciting at the time. But now, with Juliet next to him, holding a little bundle of blankets, he found himself scared. The road before him was completely and totally unknown.

He was a father.

* * *

**V: Vex **

He was annoying, stubborn and idiotic all rolled up into one big show-off with an addiction to hair gel. He had an unfailing ability to get on anyone's nerves, no matter how calm or resistant they seemed. He could sense a pineapple a mile away. He could bluff his way through (almost) any situation. He was vexing and confusing and just downright _odd_.

Nobody could understand how she had fallen in love.

* * *

**W: Wait**

Juliet had waited all her life – in the line at Friday's, in the hospital after Lassiter was shot, in traffic on the freeway. It came as no surprise that she had to wait a little bit more. He had promised he would care for her and he would grow up, take this seriously. That was three years ago.

She's still waiting.

* * *

**X: Xavier**

Juliet's father, Xavier O'Hara, was a fair man. He turned out to be one of the nicest people over sixty that Shawn was on an _official_ first-name basis with. Joanna O'Hara served lemonade and cookies (of which six disappeared into Shawn's pocket) and they all had a pleasant chat on the back porch.

After they left, Shawn made Juliet swear to never make him do something so terrifying again.

* * *

**Y: Yo-yo**

_Back and forth and back and forth and…_

Sometimes Juliet wished their relationship didn't resemble a yo-yo. She also dreamed that chocolate was healthy and world hunger would be sated.

But you can't get everything you ever wanted.

* * *

**Z: Zero**

The number of times Shawn ever regretted his relationship with Juliet. Because some things you just can't find Mexico.

* * *

_Sooo much fun to write. Hope you enjoyed it as much as I did!_

_Chronological order of the ficlets: **K O W Y J V D H N M T X Q E C A** **F I S P U G Z **|** L B** **R** [The last ones are more AU - they don't fit in the timeline.]_

_`ww_


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